Nights out after becoming a parent

So after weeks of meticulously planning a night out after a couple of years of having  two children and writing 101 lists for the baby sitter because of  course, she doesn’t know my kids the way I do, and more than likely she’ll ignore it all and give them the chocolates she’d been hiding in her pocket and let them stay up late to watch a movie, here’s the eye opening pros and cons of my night out.Fear

 

 

 

Arriving

Pro – We get to the pub and enjoy the weird experience of being able to talk at normal level voice and not listen out for any footsteps or movement.

Con – My nerves are gone as all I’m thinking of is the kids and hope they are not calling out for me.

Socialising

Pro – Nice to talk to new people and socialise

Con – Why does this person keep talking to me, I didn’t invite them into my company. How can I make them go away?

New people

Con – This person beside is dribbling and I don’t know how to stop it.

Pro – My child is doing that because he is growing teeth and that’s cool.

Art of conversation

Con – Why is this person slurring and I can’t understand the words from their mouth.

Pro – My child is learning to talk and I can teach them new words

Toilets

Con – The toilets have piss on the floor.

Pro – My child is in toilet training so that’s acceptable to be on the floor

Opposite sex

Con – Men grab your breast just random in a crowded place and think that’s OK.

Pro – Child grabs it because they are hungry.

Bouncers

Con – Bouncer won’t let me in to nightclub as not right sort and I look to old and not trendy enough.

Pro – Mammy, mammy, look at me jumping up and down on this bouncer you bought.

Fast food

Con – Why are the people in the chipper not swallowing food properly and spitting. Should I get them a bib in their size?

Pro – My child is learning to eat by themselves and it’s cute and bibs fit them.

Getting Home

Pro – I don’t have to drive and I can get a taxi.

Con – Have to listen to taxi man tell you that he knows everything and what I should do with my life!

exit

So that was my observation of my night out. How things have changed so much when before I was all about ‘what are we doing this weekend -‘what will I wear’, ‘who’s coming out,’ ‘will I meet someone?’  Why has my attitude changed to nights out,  Is it because I’m a parent or have I grown up or both ?

Does not going out on the town  mean you don’t have a social life?  My opinion is no.. I just have a different form of a social life..

So tonight I have my friends over to have a  good chat, few drinks and no one has to  stand in the cold waiting on a very informative taxi man to bring us home and also  I just couldn’t be arsed going out :-).

Children’s Books by Denise McCabe are available by clicking  here 

Email: denisekidsstories@gmail.com

 

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